life of the afterparty
by itwascrabpeople
Summary: (Septiplier) Mark/Jack afterparty confessions and mistaken pod people.


It's the end of the night, and most everyone's left except the people crashing on the floors and couches instead of going back to their hotels. Where they have beds. It's _absurd_.

"You'd miss us in the morning!" Yami exclaims from his place on the floor, grabbing onto one of Mark's ankles.

"Hey, it's your back," Mark laughs, flailing his leg to try and loosen Aaron's grip. "Let me _go_ , I'm getting you pillows and blankets and crap!" He manages to yank his leg out of Yami's grasp and heads for the hallway closet.

"Aww, you're so _thoughtful_ , Mark!" Bob says, leaning back in the recliner.

"Do I detect _sarcasm_?" Mark asks. He starts aggressively throwing the blankets and pillows at the guys, and smiles at their collective annoyed groaning. "Because you know, it's my house, Bob - I brought you into this house, I can take you out!"

"Nooo, you're super thoughtful, Marky," Wade slurs loudly, lounging face-down on the couch and blindly reaching for a pillow. "You're the - the _thoughtfullest_."

"Thank you, Wade, that is certainly a word." Wade gives him a thumbs up, and Mark glances around the room. "Hey, has anyone seen Jack?"

"Bathroom, probably," Yami says, rolling himself into a cocoon of blankets. "Said something about needing a minute."

"Shut _uuup_ ," Jesse groans, muffled by the pillow he's smooshing his face into.

"Alright," Mark laughs, and goes to turn down the light. "I guess it's time to quiet down now."

"You're not my dad," Tyler states tiredly from somewhere in the darkness.

"As far as you know," Mark answers in a deep, mysterious voice, and then he brightens. "Goodnight everybody!"

"Goodnight Mark!" Wade says happily. "Goodnight Aaron, goodnight Tyler-Boy, goodnight _Jim-Bob_ , goodnight Jesse!"

"Uugghh." Jesse groans.

"G'night Wade!" Yami laughs. "Goodnight Mark! Goodnight Tyler! Goodnight Jim-Bob! Goodnight Jesse!"

" _Uugghh_."

"Am I Jim-Bob?" Bob asks, pulling his blanket up to his chin. "Goodnight Jesse!"

" _We are not The Waltons_!" Jesse grunts into his pillow. "Shut the fuck up!"

Mark smiles as he leaves his friends to go to his own room, passing Ryan and Matt's doors as quietly as he can since they turned in early. When he passes the hallway bathroom he notices that the door is open, so he figures that Jack must be using the one in his room.

He notes that the light to his room is on as he heads towards it. "You still in the bathroom, buddy?" Mark asks playfully when he enters, "You need, like, a heavy-duty laxative? Or a trip to the ER for some probin'-?"

" _Mark_ ," Jack whispers from behind him, nearly startling Mark out of his skin.

"What the-!" Mark turns to look at Jack, who happens to be standing very close to him. "Were you standing _behind_ my door?"

"Err, yeah," Jack says, tilting his head and looking at Mark oddly. He doesn't say anything else, just stares quietly at Mark like he's a puzzle that needs solving. Mark would find this odd of anybody, but it's especially eerie for Jack.

He waves his arms out incredulously. " _Why_?"

"Dramatic effect," Jack says, straight-faced, as though that explains _anything_.

Mark stares at him expectantly but Jack doesn't elaborate. He's frowning at Mark now, his stupid green fringe falling into his face. Mark is beginning to suspect that Jack has been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a pod person. It's the only logical explanation.

"I've been... thinkin'," he finally says, rubbing at his arm. "About some stuff."

"Oh _have_ you now." Mark rests his hands on his hips, watching "Jack" suspiciously. "Thinking about what? How to be a creepy bastard?" A creepy _alien_ bastard.

Jack sighs and runs a hand through his faded green hair. "Okay Mark…" He starts but then bites his lip, and his eyes dart nervously from Mark's face. "I'm going to do somethin', and you need to not freak out… deal?

Mark stares at Jack in disbelief for a beat. "No, not _deal_!" He tries to keep his voice low for the sake of the rest of the house, but he's still gesturing wildly. "Not deal at all! I'll freak out depending on what you're going to-!"

But he doesn't get a chance to finish or even _react_ as Jack grabs the collar of his shirt and pulls him into a kiss.

A real, honest to God _kiss_.

What the _fuck_.

Mark is stunned, completely motionless against the feeling of Jack's mouth pressed firmly to his own. Though he does feel a vague sense of relief that their teeth didn't clash together with the suddenness of the kiss. God.

He's kissing _Jack_. It feels… strange. Strange because Mark's never kissed a man before. Jack has a prickly beard, Mark has a prickly beard, and their prickly beards together feel very odd. Also, there's a good chance he's kissing a pod person.

Mark is about to pull away and ask what's going on, but then Jack lets out a shuddery breath against his lips, and his fingers curl into Mark's shoulders.

" _Oh_ ," Mark breathes, and finally lifts his arms to wrap around Jack's waist. When he tilts his head to the side he finds that Jack's mouth falls open easily under his, hot and tempting. It's an interesting contrast to his strange, prickly beard, which Mark is beginning to mind less and less.

It feels really nice actually.

Oh. Well shit. How did he not know this? Mark is breathless with the realisation, can only clutch at Jack and berate his dumb self because how could he be so _stupid_! It's so big and _obvious_ now and Mark _can't believe_ he missed this about himself.

He's in love with Jack.

How the hell did he not know that?!

The air around them becomes tense, and Jack is pulling away hastily, taking a few steps back.

Mark licks his lips as he watches Jack, his thoughts running a mile a minute. " _Whoa_."

"I just needed to see…" Jack says faintly, pulling at his wristbands.

Mark just nods at him like an idiot, still processing his thoughts and trying not to give into the urge to grab Jack back to him.

"You needed to see what it was like to kiss me?

Jack is watching him with wide, wary eyes. "I'm going back to Ireland on Friday," he finally blurts out, "so it's not worth it to kill me."

Mark clears his throat and tries to keep his voice steady as he says, "Well… I wasn't _going_ to kill you."

"That is _exactly_ what a killer would say."

"Solid reasoning," Mark agrees, shuffling his feet nervously, "but I was actually gonna suggest us making out for a while."

"I-" Jack blinks at him. "Huh?"

Mark hauls him in by the arm, Figures it's payback as he kisses Jack soundly, holding him close in the doorway of his room.

"Oh God," Jack says, breaking the kiss. He starts laughing against Mark's neck. Mark is fine with it at first, but then it goes on for _way_ too long to _not_ be damaging to his ego.

"Hey," Mark says petulantly.

When Jack catches the sullen look on his face he just grins, and then starts pressing heated little kisses along Mark's jawline. "Goof."

" _You're_ a goof," Mark huffs, angling his head to the side. "Total idiotic mor _oon_."

"Speak for yourself," Jack backfires as he slides his mouth against Mark's. "I figured out this whole thing _way_ before you did."

"Oh yeah?" If there were a manly word for swooning, it would probably apply here. As it is, Mark definitely does _not_ swoon. Fuck you.

Jack smiles softly at him and nods. "Frankly, we could've been making out _months_ ago."

"Mm, never made out with a pod person before."

Jack looks at him, bemused. "Assuming I am one?"

"Would the real Jack, or, I'm sorry," Mark pauses to make air quotes, "would " _Sean_ ", really make out with me?"

"Hmm," Jack taps his chin. "Well, all signs point to yes so far."

"All _erections_ point to yes."

"Proud of yourself, are ya," Jack says with a grimace, shaking his head. "You're _disgusting_."

Mark rolls his eyes. "Oh, you're just jealous you didn't think of it!"

"I can't _believe_ I love you," Jack utters, shaking his head. "Seriously, this is my lot in life."

Mark maybe definitely swoons this time, grinning stupidly at Jack. "Maybe your Irishness is clouding your judgement."

"Probably." Jack smiles and kisses him again, slower this time. "I don't mind though."

* * *

I'm on ao3 and tumblr as **itwascrabpeople,** feel free to send any fic requests/prompts my way! feedback is also much appreciated :) thanks so much for reading!


End file.
